It is important to choose a licensed, experienced therapist. However, neither credentials nor experience is a guarantee that your psychotherapist will be able to help you.
The initial weeks of therapy are a time of assessment. You and your partner are evaluating your therapist and the therapy process. Both of you are wondering if you can trust your therapist and if it is safe to reveal difficult and painful issues.
Ask yourself the following questions:
- Does your therapist hear, understand and accept what you say?
- Does your therapist avoid taking sides?
- Does your therapist make comments that help you to see your relationship, your problems and yourself in new and revealing ways?
- Are you beginning to feel known? As an individual? As a couple?
- Are you hopeful that you will be helped?
If you can answer yes to a number of these questions you are probably developing a trusting relationship with a competent psychotherapist. Trust your instincts!